The Results Show - Part One

My children like reality shows.  Adelia and Arleigh love "So You Think You Can Dance".  (They even picked Melanie as the winner from day one!).  Griffen loves the survival type shows, especially "Top Shot" on the History Channel.  Jeff enjoys  some of the BBQ / Cooking shows.  You might also find our television on America's Next Top Model or American Idol.   Generally, after the season is over, there is a "Results Show".  The show is over-hyped, advertised widely, some entertainment factor, and then you find out who wins.  That was kind-of like my appointment today...

In my mind, today was going to be a traumatic event.  I was going to schedule the removal of my breast.  Through my blog, my fears were shared with you, and I felt your prayers today.  My parents came to the appointment with me, and there was a calming peace throughout the entire process.  I know that my peace came from the blanket of prayers surrounding me.

So, here's Part I of my "Results Show"...

Tentatively (confirmation will be received tomorrow), I am scheduled for a right breast mastectomy on Wednesday, September 7.  The left mastectomy will be performed at the time of reconstruction, at a later date.  My HER2 results are negative, which is great news! (HER2 positive breast cancers are much more aggressive and less responsive to hormone treatments.)  Dr. Martin will perform a "skin sparing mastectomy".  This type of surgery conserves as much of the breast skin as possible, for later reconstruction.

From my MRI, there is an additional suspicious area and lymph node.  Dr. Martin believes that these areas are a result from trauma the breast received from the core needle biopsy.  Regardless of the outcome, the surgical procedure will remain the same.  The surgery will last approximately 90 minutes.  Only the breast tissue is removed, not any of the muscle beneath the breast tissue.  I will stay overnight in the hospital, and then be released.

The morning of surgery, after routine IVs begin, I will be administered a radioactive injection (more glow sticks!), and then during surgery, a medical-type geiger counter will be used to identify the suspicious areas.  They will also take a biopsy of the Sentinel Node during surgery.  This sample will be frozen immediately in the operating room, and then tested.  The results will be known prior to the completion of the surgery.  If the biopsy is positive, then the lymp node will be removed.  This is very important, as it will determine treatment.

The pathology results will be known 2-3 days after surgery. (That will be Part II of the Results Show)  From the results, the oncologist will determine the best treatment plan.  There is a possibility of just chemotherapy, or a combination of chemotherapy and radiation, depending on the results.  The best part is that recovery from the surgery will be less than four weeks, and that pain is minimal...compared more to muscle pain after strenuous exercising.(Like I'd know anything about that!)

Dr. Martin was very reassuring to my parents, and they are very impressed...especially the fact that he shared his faith with them during the appointment.  He stated that God is the Healer, he is only the tool, and that he uses his God-given gift  to help others.   Any surgeon who doesn't believe in God, is just one blood-vessel away from knowing differently!  (How's that for a testimony?)

The Cancer Center is calling tomorrow to schedule my Breast Cancer Gene Test (BRCA).  I'll write more about that in a later blog.  The results of the genetic testing can affect my mother, sister, and daughters, as well as my ovaries!

Dr. Martin assured my Mom and Dad that he would take very good care of me during surgery, and would make certain that the other members of my treatment team would continue in the same manner.

I don't have all of the answers to my questions, but I have the ones that matter.  It reminds me that everything is in HIS time, not ours!

TTFN,
-S

Search for Tomorrow

This soap opera ran from 1951 to 1982 on CBS.

When I was a little girl, my days were spent with my "Grandma McCracken".  Grandma was of no blood relation, but a relation by choice.  My Mom or Dad would take me to Grandma's house in the morning, and pick me up in the afternoons.  She would sit at her dining room table (which was situated so she could see into the living room) in one of her "house dresses", and I would sit or sprawl on the couch.  I loved the couch, because if you sat in the right place, the chilly air from the air-conditioning window unit would blow directly on you.  As you can imagine, she spoiled me, though I prefer to call it "overly-loved". 

Thirty-plus years later, when I think of my days with Grandma McCracken, I think of buttered rice, cake batter (no beaters for me, she gave me my own small bowl of batter), and soap operas.  Some days, we spent running errands in a twenty-mile radius, lunching at coffee shoppes (she with her coffee and me with my hot tea), or visiting with her friends, but generally we were always back home in time for the "Soaps".  Right after the "Mid-day Report" on WCTV,  the stories began.  I remember watching Search for Tomorrow, Young and the Restless, As The World Turns and Guiding Light.  Referring back to my old soap opera watching days with Grandma McCracken, I think a fitting title for this episode of my life would be "Search for Tomorrow"!

Tomorrow is my doctor's appointment with Dr. Martin.  It's the biggie!  The appointment where I find out the official results of my tests, hear my treatment plan, ask my questions, and schedule my surgery.  Jeff is finishing up training out of town, so Mom and Dad are going to the appointment, also.  (I think it will also give them peace in meeting the man who will operate on their "baby".)

I've been researching, emailing other breast cancer survivors, and reading to compile my list of questions for tomorrow's appointment.  This is what I've come up with.  (If you can think of others, please email them to me!)

Shelby's Questions (AKA "Search for Tomorrow")

1. Cancer Type:  Invasive Ductal
2. Location:  Right Breast
3. Tumor Size:  2 to 3 cm
4. Grade:  2 (medium growth)
5. Stage:  ???  (I'm guessing possibly Stage IIA, based upon my research)
6. Hormone Receptors:  Estrogen 100% +, Progesterone 90% +
7. HER 2 Status?
8. HERS2 Status based upon what tests?
9. Lymph Node Status?  (So far, he has said none, but I want to be certain.)
10. Second opinion for Insurance status?
11. Length of surgery?
12. Reconstruction at same time of mastectomy?
13. Length of Time in Hospital?
14. Recovery time?
15. Recovery advice?  (Drains, I know, but what else?)
16. Chemotherapy details?
17. What type?
18. Begins when?
19. What side effects?
20. PET scan of entire body when?
21. What about my daughters?

Please pray for my strength during tomorrow's appointment.  I also pray that my parents and I have a peace about the treatment plan, that all of my questions are answered, and that surgery is scheduled in a way that accommodates all parties involved :)

Tomorrow is as real as it gets, folks!  Presumably, when I walk out of Dr. Martin's office Tuesday afternoon, I will have a date and time to have my breasts removed, and my search for answers will be over.

TTFN, (Literally, only for a while longer!)
-S

Oh, Sugar, Sugar

Happy Anniversary to My Wonderful Parents!

The year was 1969, and the hottest song was by a group of characters...cartoon characters!  Archie, Reggie, Jughead, Betty and Veronica, better known as "The Archies" had a  #1 hit song with, "Sugar, Sugar".  (Now, hum along in your head - "Sugar, ah honey, honey - You are my candy girl...")

This sweet bubblegum pop song, with a catchy tune,was the #1 song of 1969.  "Sugar, Sugar" was more popular than songs by The Beatles, Elvis Presley, The Jackson 5 and The Rolling Stones during this momentous year. I was just a "twinkle in God's eye" in 1969, but something even more momentous than "Sugar, Sugar" happened that year...my parents got married!

On Monday, August 29, my wonderful parents will celebrate their 42nd wedding anniversary.  (If that's not a sprinkle moment, I don't know what is!!!)  They give me love, courage, strength and knowledge.  Without them, I know I would not be the woman, wife or mother that I am today (literally and figuratively!) 

There are a lot of questions going through my head before Tuesday's doctor's appointment, but I'm pushing them to the back of my mind, and celebrating the love of my parents.

 

42 years of marriage...Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad... I love you!

 

TTFN,

-S

Split Personality

Today, I feel as if I have a "split personality". There are two people living within: Regular Shelby and Cancer-Diagnosed Shelby. Will there always be two of me from this point on?

Regular Shelby is a wife, daughter, sister, friend, media specialist and mother to three wonderful children. She wakes up, gets dressed, wakes children up, makes breakfast, drops off at daycare, and goes to work - all by 7: 25 a.m. (Ok, maybe 7:26 or 7:27, if I'm running late!) Then, she works eight hours with wonderful co-workers and great students, and begins the afternoon shift. After school, it's time to run errands, cook supper, homework, baths, laundry, housework, prepare for the next day, and then bed. Somewhere in there, I try to spend quality time with my loved ones, laugh, learn, and celebrate the "little things". Regular Shelby relishes the unexpected, yet manageable events that make each day unique. Whether it's an unexpected funny at lunch time with co-workers that results in belly-laughs, a child's milestone, confession, or a quiet moment to relax...they are all part of Regular Shelby's day.

Then, there's the newly discovered Cancer-Diagnosed Shelby. She's the one who has been overwhelmed with love and support from family, friends, classmates, co-workers and students. The one who is surrounded by prayers from Alaska to South Florida, who has the constant thought of "what's next on this journey?" She has turned into an emotional wreck (when no one is looking), but feels like she has to put up a strong front for her family. She had to ask about Family Medical Leave Act Procedures and discuss where her "Teachers As Advisers" class will go on Thursday mornings, during her leave. Cancer-Diagnosed Shelby had to answer, "Will you die, Mom?", from her son. She also has to learn breast cancer lingo, and had to answer an email from a former student asking, "Mrs. H, Is it true you have cancer?"

The challenge is merging the two. I know that Cancer will not define me, but it will forever change me and my family. I know that there will be days when one personality will be stronger than the other...but in the end, I'll still be just "Shelby".

* As a side note, my MRI is scheduled for this Thursday, August 25th at 8:00 a.m. and my appointment with Dr. Martin to discuss my treatment plan is Tuesday, August 30 at 3:50 p.m.*

TTFN,
-S

Waiting...

It's like a black cloud hanging over...is it, or isn't it??? Today I notified my co-workers and friends of my situation. I kept thinking back to my conversation with Dr. Martin yesterday, that it is TREATABLE, if the biopsy reveals that it is cancer. Based upon his estimate of 80% that the tumor is malignant, I began trying to prepare myself. I am very sore from the procedure, but determined to go to work and make the situation as normal as possible for my children.

Today was a big day. It's Adelia's debut with the JCHS Greyhound Marching Band. I am extremely tired, bruised, and swollen, but attempting to remain "normal" for the children, even though they know Mom had a procedure yesterday. Mom, Dad and Brock came for a previously scheduled weekend visit. Fortunately, they will also be here for "the phone call".

At the game, I share my present situation with several of the band parents I have had the opportunity to spend time with over the summer. One immediately asked if she could pray for me, and while standing amongst the crowd, in a world or purple and yellow, she laid her hands on me and prayed.

After the game, even as tired as I was, I walked back to the band room to get Adelia. As we waited for the band to return, I once again had the opportunity to speak with several of my new band mom friends. They were very reassuring, and offered words of comfort. As I apologized for possibly having to shed my new role as an active band mom for marching season, they quickly comforted me and encouraged me to take care of me this season, and they would help take care of Adelia. Just waiting....will I be able to attend weekend band competitions, or will I be waiting to recover from a mastectomy, as I hear the football crowd and band on Friday nights?

As a parent, I find myself thinking about how my wonderful parents are feeling. As I wait for the phone call, so are they...waiting to find out an answer that no parent should ever have to seek.


Jeff, Griffen, Brock and Arleigh


Adelia (middle) in her band debut.